I was thinking about my favourite quote earlier because it's part of my focus for the year (something I need to blog more about). This is inspired by that quote and I hope it works. The quote is right at the end of the piece. I think it's a great one for disabled people like me.
Also: day 7 of my 100 days of writing! Given the level my depression was at the fact I've made it this far is huge. I really wanted to do this but equally I wasn't sure I could. It has been tough to find the motivation on several of he days but once I get writing I'm really enjoying it.
The Lion's Den
Listening to the roar of the lions - terrifyingly loud from the safe distance of 25 metres where the audience waited and watched - you'd be forgiven for thinking that there were just two people working the Lion Life show who displayed true courage. The Lion Tamers. But you'd be wrong.
They had nerve, of course they did. And confidence. Those were the two most important personality attributes of a lion tamer. That and a hell of a lot of knowledge and skill, a dash of calmness and a burst of speed at just the right time and place were all you needed to be a lion tamer. Courage wasn't required. Courage when mixed with adrenaline and adoration (both a staple part of any zookeeper's daily routine) could sometimes lead to brashness and overconfidence. Accidents and tragedies were the all to frequent outcome when that happened.
When you arrived at the Lion Life show, that was when you met the most courageous staff member. Quiet and shy with a tendency to let her hair fall in front of her face so she could hide behind it. Most people speak to her but few notice her. And fewer still remember her. She was the ticket seller.
Years of ridicule, teasing and even physical attacks had left her depressed and suffering panic attacks. Leaving the house had been impossible for sometime. And then eventually with a lot of patience, love and support she had been able to start going out again. Then a few years after that the idea of a very part time job hadn't been as scary as when it was first suggested.
She loved her job. She really did. Or at least most of the time. On the face of it, it was an easy job. Getting there, dealing with the public, staying out all day. She found that a struggle. At times it felt insurmountable and she'd go home in tears convinced she couldn't do it. The next day, somehow, she would be back in her little ticket booth near the lions trying again
Everyday her family told her they were proud of her. Every time it got tough she'd try to remember that. And to remember that courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day saying 'I'll try again tomorrow' (Mary Anne Radmacher)