No means No. #disability #awareness

This afternoon Dad and I went racing.  We were looking at the horses who were about to race when the sun went in and it got cold.  So I told Dad that I'd go inside the building next to where we were.

That involved wheeling over to the building and then up a relatively long ramp (luckily it had switchbacks in it so it wasn't too steep).  It wasn't the easiest thing I've wheeled up recently but I'm slowly trying to build up my strength in my chair so I stuck at it.

Partway up the ramp goes past an outside area where people can have drinks.  A man called over to me

"you alright, girl? Do you need some help?"

"No, thanks.  I'm fine, it just doesn't look like it." I replied.

"Sure?" he queried

"yes, sure.  It's good for me."

"It probably is.  I wish my [family member] had your attitude."

"yeah?"

"[they've] just given up."

"Oh, I couldn't do that.  I've always been disabled so I don't know any different."

I forget what he said in response to that but our conversation ended there as I was past the bit where he was sat having a drink.  I was pleased by that conversation.

That ramp should probably be considered two because on one of the switchbacks you go into the building but then have to go straight up another bit to get to the facilities.

At the top of the ramp a steward was standing and saw me on the ramp wheeling up.  He spoke to me too.

"Can I give you a push?"

"No, I'm fine."

"it's no bother."

"really, I'm fine.  But I tell you what would be a help.  Could you open that door for me?" (I couldn't see it clearly but knew it was there)

"it's already open"

He then grabs the back of my chair over my protestations and wheels me approximately the last five metres of the ramp.  Which is basically no help and totally infuriating because he made a snap judgement that just because I'm in a chair I need help.

I'd love to meet more people like the first guy, that was a confidence boost for me.  I hope to meet very few people like the second!

Woop Woop!!

I'm up half a pound this week.  I'm not 100% convinced it's real weight gain but I'm fine with it either way.  I completely forgot to weigh first thing this morning which means that I'd had a big glass of squash by the time I did.  Plus usually I weigh when I'm dressed which I did this week as well but last week I weighed naked before I got in the shower.

What else?  I continue to be off Coke and Chocolate - Saturday will be ten whole weeks without either.  I am indifferent about whether or not (or when) I will go back to having them very occasionally.  I'm definitely not going back to the way I was having loads of both daily before but I'm not 100% sure I can do occasionally without slipping back to all the bloody time again.

And I spent Saturday up at the sailing club with some friends.  Whilst one of them was taking part in some racing me and A went for two walks around the reservoir.  We went back and had lunch with N in between.  In total we walked two and a half miles.  And I pushed my wheelchair the entire time without help!  Woop Woop!!  I had forgotten how much I missed doing that.

Saw the practice nurse last Thursday about my weight as I do about every six weeks or so.  It was all very positive but she told me I need to realise more how well I've been doing and be more positive.  Which is probably true but isn't very easy.

Am having blood tests tomorrow to check my hormone levels.  Periods have gone really screwy again (still) to such an extent that it lasted 16 days.  I think we might have reached the end of the see what losing weight does to it round.  But we shall see.

Wheeling around Town

I went shopping with my sister earlier. Just in town here but I needed a few big things which I couldn't carry home on my powerchair. Originally I had thought she may need to take a list and go alone but she said my chair would fit in as well (and it did) so I went too.

Won't bore you with the list of what I bought other than two bottles of very cheap Jose Cuervo Margarita and a magazine it was pretty much all boring house stuff - dull but necessary.

I did manage to wheel my manual chair for the entire time we were in town. The only help I had was to get into the newest of our shops (which is in a brand new never before used unit and when they prepped the shop they chose where to put the door and knocked some bricks out to do so) as when they did the door for it for some reason they didn't manage to do completely flat access - it's not a full blown proper step but its not flat level access that I can without help.

In one part of town there is a ramp and some steps up. I call the ramp "The Amazing Never Ending Ramp" because to be suitable for wheelchair users they need be no more than 1:12 and this one is 1:24 with several flat bits where steps intercept. It makes for a very easy wheel but a very very very long ramp that winds round and zigzags loads. I remember when I went up it the first time wondering just how many more sections there could possibly be.,

What is absolutely stupid however is the fact you have this amazing really easy ramp and then come out at the bottom of a really steep hill with a stupid camber. Right at the top of that ramp its really sharp for a short while before becoming still steep but much more managable. Someone didn't think that through quite fully me thinks! My arms felt like they were burning and halfway up that sharp bit I thought I couldn't do it. I could barely move at all each time I pushed my wheels and it was horrible.

Sophie however was all "I did a half marathon, you can do this." - and I did!

I'm really pleased. And also kinda sore!