Friday 10 December 2010

Reverb 10 - Wisdom

I know I'm late to this but I only found out about it yesterday.  I've just signed up to Reverb 10.  I may very well go back and touch on some of the previous prompts as a couple of them are very interesting to me. But I'll have to see how things go time wise.

Today's prompt is Wisdom.  What was the wisest decision you made this year and how did that pan out for you?

My first thought was that I needed to put my (not really blogged about) decision to try and take better care of myself down as the wisest decision I made this year.  But then I stopped for a minute and thought about it more. That's not the best or wisest decision I made this year.

In May I gave up Coke and Chocolate.  I was totally addicted to the both of them, drinking roughly a litre of "normal" coke each day and eating at least 100g of chocolate.  Originally that was supposed to be for three weeks, to prove that I could.  Three weeks was a random period of time that I picked in 2008 when I set that as a goal on my current 101 in 1001 list.  I was determined that was one of the goals I was definitely going to achieve.

And after the three weeks I didn't go back to the coke or to the chocolate.  In fact I didn't have any again until about ten days ago, over six and a half months later.

Another of my goals was six months of no missed medication.  I've not missed any for 10 months now.  I'm taking better care of myself in other ways, realising my limits more and trying to be more OK with who I am and what I'm doing.  I'm achieving goals and forgiving myself and being realistic when I can't or don't manage others.

I've lost a lot of weight, I feel better in many ways and my depression is more stable then it's been in a long time.  I really struggle at this time of year usually and I'm struggling now - just not as much as before.  I'm not as stressed or worried about Christmas as I might previously have been.  Most importantly I feel like I'm clearer on what my goals are and how I'm going to reach them.

Taking better care of myself, loving myself I suppose you could say, is definitely one of the best decisions I made this year.  But when I look at it, it all traces back to that small first step of giving up the coke and the chocolate - I didn't expect it to have such an impact on my mentally as well as physically.  And I'm not sure I could have made the decisions that I need to take better care of myself if I'd not made that decision first.

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