I love my job, I really do. I would, obviously, love it more if it were paid but never mind. Situations being what they are it's better for me that it is not. But some days I am sat there with my clients wondering quite why I am spending my time volunteering for CAB.
And lately I've definitely been finding the patience and compassion that is sometimes needed to be in short supply. Which occasionally is fine but usually is not. I am tired, and I'm stressed and more than ready for my upcoming break. But I do need to find my "that was really annoying but this is my job and it's ok" happy face again.
There's this ongoing client I've known for pretty much all the time I've been there (getting on for three years). I was told (by the client) it was a five minute job and was still with him two hours later. Which is fine. Anyway I was joking with him a bit and my patience was rapidly going - doing the same thing multiple times in an hour for the same person does that to a girl. Also I had taken my cardi off and he was questioning me about my tattoo for ages. So I eventually managed to redirect him to the subject at hand. He turned round to me and said "oh you are stroppy today Emma."
I laughed and said "Thank You." He smiled and admitted he knew I'd been joking.
And then there are the times when you know you did the best you could for your client and they mouth off and say if they have any problems they are going to come back and blame you. Or you arrange something for them which is the best deal they could possibly hope for in their situation, spend ages doing it only to have them shout at you that you're wrong and they aren't doing it.
I've had some great times there and have achieved some amazing things both personally and for my clients. I've managed to do things I never thought possible and I know I've made a difference.
But I seriously need to find some patience because just lately I've been left wanting to scream at least once a day.
It's interesting how it goes like that at times and at other times it's all lovely and people can't thank me enough.
I'm sure it's time another client brought me some chocolates or similar.