Wednesday 4 June 2008

Laughter.

I've had an interesting day today.

The short version is this morning was stressful and blah.

The afternoon was full of a couple of unexpected moments of joy within the mundane.

And then I went out training with Elisa.

Both of those things took away from the stress and the annoyances and allowed me to leave them behind where they belong.

We walked for a while after we met and then we decided to walk in the direction of the pub and the few shops on the estate.  Fine.  My chair was making a bit of a strange noise as though something was catching but neither of us could see anything it was pretty much wheeling fine (I'd wheeled through a huge thing of water right before it started doing that and after a while it stopped and wheeled as it should so I figure it was just the wet).  Elisa uses her manual chair a lot more than I use mine and I was slightly babying my chair because of the weirdness so she was a way ahead of me but not far.

This woman came up behind and asked me if I wanted her to help me and I said "No, thank you, I'm fine.  I'm trying to get fit."

She laughed at that.

The most annoying laugh ever.

And she made some random comment before walking off.

I caught up to where Elisa was waiting outside the pub and we decided a cold drink and splitting a bowl of chips in the pub would go down just nicely so we did and we chatted.  Then I wheeled myself home.  It was tiring given that it was pretty hot but it was really fun and relaxing in a way too.

I can't really describe how the incident with the laughing made me feel.  I suspect she was probably just embarrassed or didn't know how to deal with my turning her down.  But it was tough to deal with.  I would never laugh at anyone telling me they wanted to get fit be they a TAB or a PWD.  Yet she laughed at me.  My wanting to get fit is just as valid as anyone else's.

Elisa hasn't always been disabled just for the last three years or so I think.  We've known each other roughly two years so that must be about right.  She commented when we were in the pub that before she became disabled she never realised how much of an effect other people and their random comments etc can have on you.

And I don't know if she's right or not, having always been a PWD it's an experience that is alien to me.  So maybe that woman didn't realise the affect she would have on me.

But that doesn't make it any easier to live with.

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