Saturday 18 March 2006

"I don't need no good advice, no well intentioned sacrifice"

It's been a lazy, lazy day today... it's been nice. Gave me a chance to recharge my batteries and also to think somethings over and get them sorted out in my head. And my lovely friend Ted who is one of my swimming volunteers and also treasurer for the access group came round and adjusted my brakes for me so they actually work now. He really is a lovely man and I am grateful to have such a caring and helpful person in my life.
It's bitterly cold but dry out and so I took the chance to get outside and get some fresh air - I took my manual chair and so I got some exercise too. I think it helped my thinking a lot to get out of the house and away from the situation if you know what I mean.
I got a lot of conflicting advice from different people about my meeting with my social worker and how it made me feel - I think I've now figured out which path is the right one to take on this matter but the chances are I'll change my mind again between now and when I get the chance to actually act on it.

It's almost reached the point with my "key advisers" where I know pretty much what their take on each matter will be. Which is good. It does save me some time!

But it's also bad when one of them always takes the path of least resistance, least effort and in the process usually manages to give the impression that she has heard what I've said but not listened to it. Thinking it over today however I've come to realise that it's not so much that she doesn't listen to what I say but that she lacks the experiences I've had and the perspective which would allow her to see things the way I do. She sees doing something about this as making a big deal of it perhaps "rocking the boat" whereas I see doing something about it as a positive thing - preventative action which should stop myself (and potentially others) from ending up in the same situation in the future.

One of the most important lessons I learned during my training for CAB is that it doesn't matter whether you agree with what your client feels. It's what they feel and so it's valid and you have to accept that. Agreement doesn't matter, acceptance does.

I've been dealing with quite a few people in my life outside of CAB lately who need to learn that lesson - the world would be a better place if we worried less about agreeing with people and starting accepting our differences and being proud of them instead.

But then I guess that's just wishful thinking and a dream that is highly unlikely to ever come true.

1 comment:

Libragirl said...

Good luck on your 1001 things. I hope you accomplish all of them. Let us know how you do.
It's an awesome idea.

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